Why aren't you a Trump supporter?

I understand that you can’t just fucking nuke a hurricane

A real man doesn’t grab women by the p***y

I actually pay taxes

Why would my nipples hurt when I touch them?

I understand geography enough to know that Belgium is not a “beautiful city”, that Paris is not in fucking Germany, that India does share a border with China, that that border is peppered with Bhutan and Nepal, not “Button” and “Nipple”, that time zones exist, that “shithole countries” do not, that “England” and “the UK” are not the same thing, that you cannot build a wall in Colorado to keep out New Mexico, and that the Bronx is not and has never been “a very wonderful place in fucking Germany”

I don’t watch or listen to advertising

It’s uncool to lurk around teenage girls’ dressing rooms

How did it feel when experiencing gay sex for the first?

When a reporter declines to join me in the rooftops fantasy I don’t go on stage and gyrate to mock his congenital disability

I’ve never tried to pretend the word would means wouldn’t

Let us count the ways. Captain Obvious says:

My ex moved on so fast. How can I overcome the pain?

I don’t believe in asking the people of Iowa “how stupid are the people of Iowa”

I respect other cultures and don’t respect those who don’t

I don’t buy made-up stories of “thousands and thousands of people dancing on rooftops”

What is the most gay experience with your dad?

I understand historical events enough to know there were no airports in the eighteenth century, that Canada didn’t burn the White House half a century before it existed and that World War Two already happened

I understand that when you lose an election you step the fuck aside and take it like a man rather than invade the Capitol while your loss is being made official just because you’re a fucking snowflake WIMP

I don’t hold serial bankrupters in high regard

Do very hot men ever feel attracted to an ugly woman? Why?

EVEN FUCKING MIKE PENCE understands that

I don’t run and hide from a debate like a fucking WIMP just becuase some moderator asked pointed questions

I don’t respect a sleazeball who lies about his height just so he can lie about his weight

Tourists break crystal-covered chair at Italian museum: "Every museum's nightmare has come true" - CBS News

I know the difference between “give me your tired, your poor” and “they’re poisoning our blood”

I have complete contempt for fakery

I don’t buy bullshit

As a woman, what would be you response to a male friend’s offer of a full body massage?

I don’t believe the way to respond to a hurricane is to call a press conference to describe it as “wet from the standpoint of water”, to distribute Play Doh, or to stand at a podium throwing rolls of paper towels as if they were bottles of ketchup

I don’t believe Nazis, Klan klowns and white supremacists chanting “Jews will not replace us” comprise “very fine people”

I took the same Oath and took it seriously

Why do I sweat so much? I’m 17 but I feel like I always need to re-apply deodorant and I am always self-conscious that I smell because I feel sweat under my arms.

I didn’t get out of military service with fucking “bone spurs” that I paid a doctor to write

Fuck that piece of orange shit, fuck his idiocracy, fuck his sexism, fuck his racism, fuck his religionism, fuck his divisionism, fuck his lying, fuck his orange face paint, fuck his worship of Cult of Ignorance, fuck his Cult, fuck his jingoistic horseshit, fuck his manuipulations, fuck his toddler-age WIMPism, fuck his fucked-up values of ME ME ME and did I mention ME, and fuck him personally with a giant razor sharp dildo that’s been preheated to 204.7° F and built to the dimensions of the Washington Monument. Slowly.

I know the difference between “George Bush” and “Jeb Bush”

Why do people say African Americans act the way they do because they're poor, when the ones with money act the same?

I see through liars

I know the difference between Sioux City and Sioux Falls and even Sioux Center

It’s uncool to set up soft porn pics with your own preteen daughter

It’s time to let Iron Galaxy make a brand new Tony Hawk game, and wipe the worst one from history - Video Games Chronicle

I can count

I have complete contempt for intentional stupidity

I have no sicko desire to control women or have a bizarro hangup with “blood”

How did you cope when someone you love, dealing with hyper-independence and trauma, felt they needed space to heal alone? Were you able to support them without overstepping, and did you eventually reconnect? How did that journey unfold?

I know who the president of Turkey really is

authoritarians can get down on the floor and bite my ass, yesterday

If someone works for me, I actually pay them

Why are people of mixed race seen as more attractive than non-mixed-race people?

I don’t believe there is a fucking “president of the Virgin Islands”

I don’t call Tim Cook “Tim Apple” and if I do I don’t deny what’s right there on the videotape because I’m too much of a fucking WIMP to handle Reality

I don’t cotton to rapists

Why would Trump make conspiracy claims that Haitians are eating pets in Ohio?

When I go Greenland shopping and Denmark says no I don’t melt down like a fucking WIMP

I don’t pretend not to know who David Dooky is just because he can deliver votes

I know what Nikki Haley’s authority with the National Guard is

What factors contributed to The Beatles' bitterness?

I have complete contempt for fraudsters, and even less for repeat ones

I know that he didn’t run against “Obamna”

I don’t hide in my hotel room while everybody else keeps the appointed time and place because my hair might get wet

Is there such a thing as "left wing fascism"? If not, what is an example of a political ideology that is often mistakenly labeled as "left wing fascism"?

I understand how hurricane paths work

I respect women and don’t respect those who don’t

I don’t respect shameless hucksters who try to sell a vitamin where you have to mail in your pee

I have complete contempt for traitorism

I have a reading level above third grade

Those are a few reasons off the top of my head. How ’bout you?

I have an acute aversion to scumbags

I understand that you can’t inject bleach or light

I can read

I know that sounds DO NOT cause cancer.

I know there’s no such thing as invisible planes

I know that if I or anyone I know commits a crime we’ll go to the clink

I don’t believe that Saudi Arabia and Russia “will vedoop bedeep uhhhh”